TLP: Avengers: Infinity War Sparks Stream of Assaults
This article was published in The Lemon Press Issue 36, on May 22nd 2018. Full issue found here.
The government has had to issue a warning to the general public after the release of the newest Avengers movie. According to police reports, people should refrain from talking about the movie to any extent, to avoid someone screaming 'SPOILERS!' and proceeding to attack them.
Multiple accounts of assault litter the country, including a CEO who pushed their coworker out of a window after said coworker spoke of Thanos gaining some infinity stones; a 13 year-old schoolgirl burning her friend's books after said friend spoke of Bucky returning; and a man who, overhearing an old lady saying how she liked Spiderman, proceeded to hit her with his car.
The Government has warned the public to not speak of the movie at all, as even mentioning things in the trailer is treading too far into ‘SPOILER’ territory. They also advised not to talk about past films either. Just pretend the franchise doesn't exist and you should be fine.
(Disney) On their way to stop the spoilers…